Since I can remember, I was interested to look deep, behind the masks and superficialities of life and in people, to meet and feel my true essence and that of other people. Since my family immigrated from Kasakhstan to Germany when I was 9 years old, I rather experienced the isolation and disconnection from this essence, feeling disrooted and alienated within myself and my whole surrounding and life in general.

Back in August of 2016, when I saw this picture, the memory of my childhood in Kasakhstan in the woods around the mountain of Alatau in Almaty where I was born, started to emerge.I started to remember where my roots come from, when I was still feeling so very much connected with nature, family, my lively and irrepressive nature. Shortly afer, I organised a big online conference „Natürlich leben und lernen“ (around new education and community living forms). It ran between 14-28th of February 2017. Afterwards, I began to heal many of my roots based on healing the inner child wounds, negative patterns and eventually also felt the urge to heal my ancestral roots. So I organised a Crowdfundingcampaign to travel with the transsiberian Railway through Russia, Kasakhstan and Mongolia. On my travels, I was stitiching my destiny rug „Rushnyk“ after a very long slawic tradition and planting seeds, connecting with my roots through holding the thread and reconnected with the ancestral soil through planting of seeds. Thus, I was able to integrate some ancestral roots while fulfilling my life‘s long dream by realising this big journey with the help of this Crowdfundingcampaign: 

Since my return of the journey with the transsiberian Railway, strenghtened by the reintegration of my roots and feeling like having wings through the realisation of my life dream, I feel like I am whole again, connected with my unique essence , with my Soul. I now have a strong connection to my intuitive power and receive many answers that way via metaphors and images. I started to ask myself how I could have practical tools to tap into this powers of intuitive readings, and shortly after the universe provided the answer by sending the Training Course to become a Soul based Coach. What a coincidence that I was able to to do the training in English, the language most familiar to my Soul since I happen to have lived and studied in the UK for almost 11 years. In the Academy of Soul based Coaching with Annemiek van Helsingden, I have learned how to communicate with my Soul and that of my clients with the help of certain „clean questions“ by holding the space for the Soul to emerge and to answer in metaphors, the language of the Soul. This is such a sacred and highly precuious work based on setting an intention at the beginning and establish a desired outcome as the foundation for all the ansewrs to emerge from within. Hence here my Facebook-Titlepage:


Embroidering to me is a process of setting intentions through centering and becoming conscious and in contact with my Soul and Spirit. When I am in this centre, I receive messages from 'above' in terms of symbols, which then manifest themselves stitch by stitch, in the here and now, like in,- and outbreath. It is like a holy magical process, similar to planting seeds which then open up: similarly intentions open up when they realise themselves in reality. Herefore, it is necessary to communicate with the own Soul. This is for me the same like 'holding the thread'. This is possible in #SoulbasedCoaching where I would ask you certain 'clean questions' through which you will be able to get in touch with your own soul's wisdom and receive your own messages.

Roots and wings have been successfully integrated, life as a bridgebuilder and connector and transition specialist just started: A bridgebuilder between roots and wings by means of communicating with the Soul and helping people to realise their dreams with the help of Crowdfunding.

Personally, I find it very important to connect with our roots, to become aware of our origin, heritage and ancestral past, but at the same time also living in the moment, and inviting the newness, the everpresent change that is happning NOW. To hold this balance, to honour tradition and at the same time inviting the everpresent beginning. Like an in-, and outbreath, the inbetween space where the magic resides. In that respect, I feel for a very long time like a bridgebuilder and connector/Transition Specialist between the old and the new, past and future, inside and outside, the natural and the technological, sky and earth, the roots and the wings.

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Like a tree, I see myself like a bridgebuilder and connector between different transitions and disciplines, and also online and offline. With the help of my embroidery practice, I can put my intuitive intentions setting into practice: through emboidery of certain sacred symbols in rugs or on dresses, towels, etc. they manifest in the here and now. It is an ongoing pratice of keeping the balance between those different worlds and tasks, and I can uphold the balance through the focus on my intuitive guidance, my centre through Yoga, Meditation and sacred embroidery.

I am a single mother of an almost 9 years old Powerlion son: half Moroccan, partly German,/French/Russian. He is a multicultural, cosmopolitan four-culture kid par excellance and my life as a single mother juggling the different cultural influences and challnges around job and conflicts with my ex-Moroccan husband, have made me to a bridgebuilding magician of some sort.

I have learnt to focus on my inner strength regardless the outside circumstances, being desired outcome orientated instead of looking at the conflicts solely and training myself in Yoga and Meditation. Together with a healthy nutrition and becoming a founding member of a non-profit society to build a free natural school here in Germany, I am more than passionate to work and being part of establishing new educational systems and co-creative community building forms.

Since orgnaising the big online summit around new educational sytems and living forms in February of 2017, I am aiming to provide examples of how to live a more healthy, happy and sustainable live following the motto: together it is easier to be successful and to live a life full of Soul and vitality!


Furthermore, I was running a hand crafts group for three years in the nursary of my son when he was younger. There, I found out my love for embroidery in particular. So I attended a workshop last year in May on the island of Germany close to the Eastern sea, called Rügen. I have learned from a traditional Slawic embroiderer Nadjesha (see her website: how to sew a destiny rug called „Rushnyk“. (

Since I attended the emboidery workshop at the island Rügen, and started to embroider my own personal destiny rug, I was led to my ancestral roots in Kasakhstan, Siberia and Mongolia while travelling with the transsibirian Railway through those countries last year. When I learned to embroider Kasakh style embroidery in Mongolia with an old indiginous lady, I felt such a deep reconnective moment when looking into her eyes: it was like the grenadmother of all origins from this cultural background called Umaj, was speaking to me and was saying: „So good you returned back home and that you started to hold the ancestral thread. Now continue to recover all the lost stories and threads from our cultural heritage.“


I couldn‘t forget her deep seeing and her words ever since. Also, I am not able to put down the thread anymore and it flows and flows through me. I received a Soul Tree Horoscope reading by two Russian ladies which is based on the idea that each women has got 7 main Goddesses‘ powers at her side from her birth onwards. Each Goddess (Beregini in Russian) has got a symbol, so when I received my main 7 Goddesses powers by means of certain symbols which also represnt my life‘s tree, I immediately got the intuitive feeling I need to sew a dress and to stitch those symbols in the dress. On the bottom my three Goddess symbols that stand for my roots, in the middle my main Godess Power, and on the dress sleeves the ones represeting the tree crown, my wings.


My symbols out of the Soul Tree Horoscope: Below the symbols stand for the Protectress, Harmonious, and the Powerful; in the middle for the wise Raven, and above: The Muse, Courageous, and the Healer.


And here is how it looks like in my finished Dress:


I have read the book by Olga Karidithi „Entering the circle“ two years ago, and when I saw into the eyes of the old Kasakh woman who taught me Kasakh style emboidery in Mongolia, I realised that the main character of the book, the Earth Mother Umaj from the Alteimountain region herself, was looking and speaking to me. It was like her eyes standing for the universe, were telling me clearly to continue to hold the thread and help search and recover the lost stories/threads of those indiginous women from the heterogenous region around the Alteimountains: Siberia, Kasakhstan, Mongolia, China.

And so I continued to stitch and to also write about my experiences on my blog and also in the Yogini Sadhana Group: and on Facebook: When I participated in the 21 days Gaia Sadhana with Chameli Ardagh and Claire Dubois (I am also a treesister) there was a webinar around embroidery and how it all holds together like a tapestry of life. That reminded me of my other favourite quote by Rainer Maria Rilke:

rainer-maria-rilke-quote-destiny-itself-is-like-a-wonderful-wide-tapes.jpg pick up the invisible thread of our own story and follow where it leads. Our job is to find the thread of our own dream and live it all the way to the end.” ~Michael Meade

Since I picked up my own unique thread, it is leading me to Siberia in three weeks time to the holy mountain of Belukha, where I will continue my embroidery with indigenous women there:

For German speakers, I have written a blog article last year about my journey of roots and wings and how I picked up my own thread here: